Sometimes we have vivid dreams about past partners, and you may be wondering, why do I keep dreaming about my ex? The spiritual meaning of dreaming about your ex isn’t always that you want them back. While it is possible that you dream about your ex because you wish you were still together, there are many other meanings.
It’s possible that you are sick and they are a negative source for you to dream about. Or perhaps they represent something that you need in your life, even if they no longer need to be that source.
In short, dreaming about your ex has many meanings. It’s the context of the dream and how you feel during and after that are important. To better understand the spiritual meaning, psychological theories are a good place to gain clarity.
Psychological Theories For Deciphering Dreams
Psychodynamic theory means that the dream is directly connected to what you did that day. It is a way to unlock your unconscious mind. Whenever we don’t know how we feel or what we think about something, a psychodynamic dream can connect us to that.
When you have a Psychodynamic Theory dream about your ex, it may feel real. In this case, you will dream about day-to-day life with your ex and unlock what you believe life would be like with your ex now.
Activation-Input-Modulation (AIM) Model
The Activation-Input-Modulation (AIM) Model theory means that our brains are in overdrive, writing a new story as we sleep. These may not be related to our daytime thoughts or activities, but a new world our brains create as we sleep. We may apply some of what we dream about in this case to the real world.
When you have an AIM dream about your ex, it may be hard to remember the details. There also may be outlandish occurrences in the dream that feel more like a sci-fi or fantasy movie than real life.
The Neurocognitive Theory means that our brains are trying to remember something. These dreams are our brains’ way of recreating memories in our heads while we sleep. They may or may not be accurate, so don’t put too much stock into the details.
When you have a Neurocognitive Theory dream about your ex, you may feel like you’re reliving the past. You have a vague recollection of what happened in your dream happening in real life, but it felt different.
Reasons You Dream About A Former Partner
- You never got closure.
- You just broke up.
- You feel incomplete.
- Your ex took on a role you no longer have.
- You had a bad day.
- You spent too much time together.
Spiritual Meaning Of Dreaming About Your Ex
1. You Still Have Feelings For Them
You may dream about your ex if you still have feelings for them. The feelings can be emotional, physical, or spiritual. If you believe they are your soulmate, then you may want to get back together but they don’t want the same. If you wake up longing for them, you probably still have feelings for them.
2. The Wounds are Fresh
If you just broke up, it’s normal to dream about your ex. You may be going through the stages of grief and are in a transitioning period. Dreams about your ex will continue for some time as your subconscious learns that they are no longer in your life.
3. There are Unfulfilled Needs
When your ex fulfilled specific needs of yours, dreaming about them can happen. This could be a physical need or they were once the only person you could talk to. Not having this in your life is difficult and your subconscious uses your ex to fulfill that need in your dream. The dream means it’s time to find something else to fulfill that need.
4. You’re Not Feeling Well
If you are sick or having a rough day, you may dream about your ex because they represent negative energy. This may turn into a nightmare if the ex was abusive. Over time, you may find yourself having different nightmares when you’re under the weather, letting you know you’re letting go of the pain they caused.
5. You Were Together A Long Time
If someone is in your life for an extended period of time, you will dream about them. This doesn’t mean you’re not over them but that your subconscious has so many memories of them, that it atomically places them in your dream. Sometimes this is just as a filler and not a central point in your dream.
6. They Represent Something
Your ex may represent something to you if you dream about them. This could be companionship, a place in the world, or if you’re co-parenting, they may represent parenthood. So they may not be themselves in the dream, but something that you use to represent something else.
7. Their Strong Suits are Something You Lack
The phrase “opposites attract” has some truth to it as we often are drawn to people with traits we admire. We admire these traits because we lack them. So if your ex has traits that you feel are weak in yourself, you may dream about them so you can work on strengthening those weaknesses.
8. You Need Closure
Most relationships are messy when they end, so if you dream about your ex, it may be because things didn’t end well. The best way to move past this is to seek closure with them. If they were abusive, refrain from this and seek therapy instead.
9. You Feel Guilty
If you believe you wronged your ex, you may dream about them because you feel guilty. When this happens, you may need to apologize or admit the guilt aloud when you’re alone to move on, vowing to be better in the future.
10. Your Relationship is Struggling
If your current relationship is struggling, even for a day, you may dream about your ex to compare them. This isn’t healthy as it suggests things were good with your ex. But if they were good, you’d still be together. Do your best to embrace the relationship you have now if you choose to stay in it.
11. You are Lonely
If you feel alone, you may dream about your ex even if being with them won’t help. This is a natural response to loneliness as people we once considered close to us will pop up in our dreams whenever we need someone to talk to.
12. Doing Something That Reminds You of Them
If you saw a movie that your ex liked or ate at their favorite restaurant, you may dream about them that night. This is nothing to worry about and usually doesn’t mean anything. However, making new memories can help make these dreams less frequent.
13. You Miss Their Family/Lifestyle
Sometimes, you may miss your ex’s friends or family more than you miss them. This can happen if you grow close to your siblings or parents and don’t feel comfortable talking to these family members anymore.
14. They are Thinking of You
It is possible that a psychic connection is making you dream about your ex. If you can’t find any other reason, you may need to find a way to break this connection if you don’t want them in your life.
15. You Need to Find Who You Are Again
Dreaming about your ex can mean that they were a big part of your identity. Now that they are gone, you need to find who you want to be all over again. This happens a lot when you are together for a long time or you lost yourself when you were with them.
What To Do When You Keep Dreaming About Your Ex
If you keep dreaming about your ex, you have a choice to make. You can reach out to them, see a therapist, or attempt to confront the dream on your own. To do this, you’ve already taken the first step – finding out why you’re dreaming about your ex.
The spiritual meaning behind dreaming about your ex can help you face the problem. They were a big part of your life and now they’re gone; it takes time to move on in every way. If you don’t want them back or to express your feelings to them, you need to forgive them and yourself.
Practice self-compassion and find another outlet. If all else fails, journal. Write your feelings and each dream down. Read it whenever you’re not thinking about them to see it from an outside perspective. Finally, never be afraid to reach out to trusted friends or a therapist if dreaming about your ex disrupts your life.