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100+ Best Mom Jokes

By Elisha Baba


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Mom jokes often revolve around relatable everyday situations and poke fun at typical mom quirks and behaviors in a fun, lighthearted, family-friendly way. They frequently get left behind as dad jokes take over, but mom jokes deserve just as much praise.

100+ Best Mom Jokes

Whether it’s jokes to make mom feel appreciated or classic “yo momma” jokes to have fun with, there’s a mom joke out there for everyone. So don’t be afraid to share these mom jokes, knowing they’ll bring laughter to any family gathering.

75-125 Best Mom Jokes That Even Your Mom Will Laugh At

Jokes About Being a New Mom

  1. I don’t want to sleep like a baby. I want to sleep like my husband.
  2. Why did the baby strawberry cry? Because his mom was in a jam!
  3. I hate when I’m waiting for mom to cook dinner, and then I remember I am the mom, and I have to cook dinner.
  4. You know you’re a mom when picking up another human to smell their butt isn’t only normal, but necessary.
  5. New mom math: Being able to instantly calculate age by months, even after one year.
  6. You know you’re a mom when you understand why Mama Bear’s porridge was too cold.
  7. What did the mother broom say to the baby broom? It’s time to go to sweep!
  8. Motherhood is fun and all, but have you ever had the house alone on a Saturday?

Mom Knock-Knock Jokes

  1. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Yo mama. Yo mama who? Yo mama who knows you didn’t throw out the garbage like I asked you to.
  2. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Al. Al who? Al give you a hug for Mother’s Day!
  3. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Abby. Abby who? Abby Mother’s Day!
  4. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Alec. Alec who? Alec to give mommy Mother’s Day kisses
  5. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bacon. Bacon who? Bacon brownies for Mother’s Day.
  6. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ivana. Ivana who? Ivana give you a kiss for Mother’s Day!
  7. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Justin! Justin who? Justin time to say Happy Mother’s Day!
  8. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Howard. Howard who? Howard you like breakfast in bed, Mommy?
  9. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Omelet Omelet who? Omelet Mommy sleep in today.
  10. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Llama. Llama who? Llama Llama, I love my mama!

Mom Jokes for Kids

  1. What did the panda give his mommy? A bear hug.
  2. I asked my mom if she could make me a sandwich. She said, “Poof! You’re a sandwich!”
  3. Don’t wake up Mom! There are at least seven species that eat their young. Your mom may be one of them.
  4. What are the three quickest ways to spread a rumor? The internet, telephone, and telling your mom.
  5. What makes more noise than a child jumping on mommy’s bed? Two children jumping on mommy’s bed!
  6. My Mom told me I’d never amount to anything because I procrastinate too much.
  7. I said, “Oh, yeah? Just you wait.”
  8. What did the mommy spider say to the Baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.
  9. When your mom’s voice is so loud, even your neighbors brush their teeth and get dressed.
  10. Why did the bean children give their mom a sweater? She was chili.
  11. Where do baby Transformers come from? Opti-Mom Prime.

Jokes for Moms to Tell

  1. “It’s spicy” is a universal mom code for “I don’t want to share.”
  2. Why is a computer so smart? Because it listens to its motherboard.
  3. Why is Mother’s Day before Father’s Day? So the kids can spend all their Christmas money on Mom.
  4. Yes, please get a new cup every time you need water — said no mom ever.
  5. Cleaning with kids in the house is like brushing your teeth with Oreos.
    34. I bought my mom a mug that says, “Happy Mother’s Day from the World’s Worst Son”.
  6. My kid sure talks a lot of crap for someone who still puts Crocs on the wrong feet.
  7. I forgot to mail it but I think she knows.
  1. There are two amounts of pasta moms are good at cooking:
  2. Not enough and enough for 3,000 people.
  3. Is it yelling? Or just very enthusiastic motivational speaking?
  4. Why do my kids never appreciate that I stayed up all night overthinking for them?
  5. Good moms let their kids lick the beaters. Great moms turn them off first.
  6. Silence is golden. Unless you have kids, then silence is suspicious.
  7. Please excuse the mess. My kids are making memories. Of me yelling at them. To clean up the mess.
  8. I love my kids. Not enough to flip the chicken nuggets halfway through cooking, but I love them.

Yo Mama Jokes

Best Yo Mama Jokes

  1. Yo mama so strict, she enforced a curfew for the entire neighborhood.
  2. Yo momma so short, she went to see Santa and he told her to get back to work.
  3. Yo mama’s so depressing, blues singers come to visit her when they’ve got writer’s block.
  4. Yo momma is so poor, she chases the garbage truck with a grocery list.
  5. Yo mama’s so lazy, she has a stay-at-home job and still is late to work.
  6. Yo mama’s so confusing, even Scooby Doo couldn’t solve that mystery.
  7. Yo mama’s so nasty, they used to call them “jumpolines” ’til yo mama bounced on one.
  8. Yo mama house is so dirty, she has to wipe her feet before she goes outside.
  9. Yo mama so nasty, she went swimming and made the Dead Sea.
  10. Yo mama’s so poor, she can’t even afford to pay attention.
  11. Yo mama’s teeth are so yellow, I can’t believe it’s not butter.
  12. Yo mama so scary, the government moved Halloween to her birthday.
  13. Yo momma so old, she was a waitress at the Last Supper.
  14. Yo mama’s cooking so nasty, the house flies got together to fix the hole in the window screen.
  15. Yo momma is so lazy, she stuck her nose out the window and let the wind blow it.
  16. Yo momma’s armpits are so hairy, it looks like she’s got Buckwheat in a headlock.
  17. Yo mama’s so short, you can see her feet on her driver’s license.
  18. Yo mama so old, she walked into an antique store, and they didn’t let her leave.
  19. Yo mama’s so poor, the ducks throw bread at her.
  20. Yo momma so short, she has to slam dunk her bus fare.
  21. Yo mama’s so poor, Nigerian princes wire her money.
  22. Yo mama’s teeth are so yellow when she smiles at traffic, it slows down.
  23. Yo momma so old, her Social Security number is one.
  24. Yo momma so old, she knew Burger King when he was a prince.
  25. Yo mama is so mean, even Hello Kitty said goodbye.
  26. Yo mama’s so mean, they don’t give her happy meals at McDonald’s.
  27. Yo mama’s so classless, she’s a Marxist utopia.
  28. Yo mama’s so old, she walked out of a museum and the alarm went off.
  29. Yo mama’s glasses are so thick when she looks at a map, she can see people waving.

Yo Mama So Fat

  1. Yo mama’s so fat, when she fell I didn’t laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.
  2. Yo mama is so fat, she gets group insurance.
  3. Yo momma is so fat, I swerved to miss her in my car and ran out of gas.
  4. Yo mama’s so fat, her car has stretch marks.
  5. Yo mama’s so fat, it took me two buses and a train to get to her good side.
  6. Yo mama’s so fat, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.
  7. Yo mama’s so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a whole species will become extinct.
  8. Yo mama’s so fat, when she skips a meal, the stock market drops.
  9. Yo mama’s so fat, she can’t even jump to a conclusion.
  10. Yo mama’s so fat, her blood type is Ragu.
  11. Yo mama so fat, when she walked past the TV, I missed three episodes.
  12. Yo mama’s so fat, when she goes camping, the bears hide their food.
  13. Yo mama’s so fat, when she wears high heels, she strikes oil.
  14. Yo mama’s so fat, when she went to KFC and the cashier asked what size bucket she wanted, she said, “The one on the roof!”
  15. Yo mama so fat, when she talks to herself, it’s a long-distance call.
  16. Yo mama’s so fat, she stepped on a scale and it said: “To be continued.”
  17. Yo mama’s so fat, she was overthrown by a small militia group, and now she’s known as the
  18. Republic of Yo Mama.
  19. Yo mama is so big, her belt size is “equator.”

So Stupid

  1. Yo mama’s so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead to make up her mind.
  2. Yo mama’s so stupid, she stared at a cup of orange juice for 12 hours because it said: “Concentrate.”
  3. Yo mama’s so stupid, she got hit by a parked car.
  4. Yo mama so dumb, she sold her car to get gasoline money.
  5. Yo mama is so dumb, she cooked her own complimentary breakfast.
  6. Yo momma so stupid, when I told her that she lost her mind, she went looking for it
  7. Yo mama so stupid, she climbed over a glass wall to see what was on the other side.
  8. Yo momma so stupid, when they said, “Order in the court,” she asked for fries and a shake.
  9. Yo mama so dumb, she thought Twitter was social media for birds.
  10. Yo mama’s so stupid, she thought a quarterback was a refund.
  11. Yo mama’s so stupid, it takes her two hours to watch 60 Minutes.
  12. Yo mama’s so stupid, she got locked in the grocery store and starved to death.
  13. Yo mama so dumb, she thought Dunkin’ Donuts was a basketball team.
  14. Yo mama’s so stupid, she tried to eat Eminem.

So Ugly

  1. Yo mama is so ugly she made dirt look like a supermodel.
  2. Yo mama’s so ugly, when she was born the doctor slapped your grandma.Yo mama’s so ugly, she threw a boomerang and it refused to come back.
  3. Yo mama so ugly she’s only allowed to go out on October 31.
  4. Yo mama so ugly I heard that your dad first met her at the pound.
  5. Yo mama’s so ugly, her birth certificate is an apology letter.
  6. Yo mama is so ugly, she walked into a haunted house and walked back out with a job application.
  7. Yo mama’s so ugly, she made a blind kid cry.
  8. Yo mamma is so ugly when she tried to join an ugly contest they said, “Sorry, no professionals.”
  9. Yo mama so ugly I told her to take out the trash and she left the house.
  10. Yo momma so ugly, when she looks in the mirror, the reflection ducks.
  11. Yo mama’s so ugly, she could make an onion cry.
  12. Yo mama’s so ugly when she was little, she had to trick-or-treat by phone.
  13. Yo mama so ugly they didn’t give her a costume when she tried out for Star Wars.
  14. Yo mama so ugly just after she was born, her mother said “What a treasure!” and her father said, “Yes, let’s go bury it.”
  15. Yo momma so ugly that most Snapchat filters make her better looking.
  16. Yo mama so ugly her portraits hang themselves.
  17. Yo mama is so ugly she looked out the window and got arrested for mooning.
  18. Yo mamma so ugly, even Ripley wouldn’t believe it.
  19. Yo mama so ugly even bullets refuse to kill her.
  20. Yo momma is so ugly even the trash man wouldn’t pick her up.

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