Home » Family Fun » 100+ Best Dad Jokes for Kids

100+ Best Dad Jokes for Kids

By Elisha Baba


Published on

Dad jokes for kids are some of the most legendary jokes of all time. Not only are they funny, but they are understandable even from a young age, making them fun to share among adults and kids alike. Dad jokes for kids can be shared at family dinners, gatherings, or even the neighborhood BBQ.

Dad Jokes for Kids

What is a Dad Joke?

A dad joke is a corny or cheesy joke that one would expect to hear from their dad. Because they are typically thought of as something your dad would say, dad jokes are wholesome and safe to share with friends and family.

100+ Best Dad Jokes for Kids

Funny Dad Jokes for Kids

While dad jokes are known for being cringey, some are actually funny. These dad jokes are a rare gem, however, so save them for the best occasions.

  1. “Why did the Oreo go to the dentist? It lost its filling.”
  2. “Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems.”
  3. “Why are fish so smart? Because they swim in schools.”
  4. “Why did the employee get fired from the keyboard factory? He wasn’t putting in enough shifts.”
  5. “Did you hear the one about the claustrophobic astronaut? He just needed a little space.”
  6. “What kind of music should you listen to while fishing? Something catchy!”
  7. “What do dogs and phones have in common? Both have collar ID.”
  8. “How do you stop a bull from charging? You cancel its credit card.”
  9. “What sounds like a sneeze and is made of leather? A shoe.”
  10. “If money doesn’t grow on trees, then why do banks have branches?”
  11. “I was once a personal trainer, until I gave a too-weak notice.”
  12. Have you heard how popular the local cemetery is? People are just dying to get in.”
  13. Kid: I’ll call you later!Dad: Just call me Dad!”
  14. Q: What’s the easiest way to burn 1,000 calories? A: Leave the pizza in the oven.”
  15. Q: What’s the difference between a badly dressed kid on a bicycle and a well-dressed kid on a tricycle? A: Attire!”
  16. Q: What did the drummer call his twin daughters? A: Anna One, Anna Two.”
  17. This pencil has two erasers. It’s totally pointless.”
  18. My kid just asked me ‘Can I have this, apple?’ Guess he doesn’t know my name is Dad.”
  19. Kid: Dad, it hurts when I move my arm like this. Dad: Then don’t move your arm like that.”
  20. Why do skeletons stay so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin.”
  21. “Why did the coach go to the bank? To get his quarter back.”
  22. “Why do nurses like red crayons? Sometimes they have to draw blood.”
  23. “What kind of jewelry do rabbits wear? 14 carrot gold.”
  24. “Why can’t the sailor learn the alphabet? Because he kept getting lost at C.”
  25. “I want to name my puppies Rolex and Timex so I can have watch dogs.”
  26. Q: Why are balloons so expensive? A: Inflation.”
  27. Q: Why can’t you send a duck to space? A: Because the bill would be astronomical.”
  28. Q: What happened when the world’s tongue-twister champion got arrested? A: They gave him a tough sentence.”
  29. Q: What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A: A stick.”
  30. Q: What breed of dog can jump higher than a skyscraper? A: Any breed of dog. Skyscrapers can’t jump.”
  31. Q: Why are peppers the best at archery? A: Because they habanero.”

Corny Dad Jokes for Kids

Corny dad jokes are common, but it doesn’t mean they aren’t fun to bring up at the dinner table. Just be careful as not all corny dad jokes will get your kids to laugh.

  1. “Did you hear about the king that went to the dentist? He needed to get crowns.”
  2. “What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.”
  3. “What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.”
  4. “I just paid $100 for a belt that doesn’t fit — what a huge waist!”
  5. “I finally watched that documentary on clocks. It was about time.”
  6. Q: Did you hear about the square that got into a car accident? A: Yeah, now he’s a rect-angle!”
  7. Q: What do you call an illegally parked frog? A: Toad.”
  8. Why did the bicycle keep falling over? It was two tired.”
  9. Hey kids, I got you Fortnite. But it will only last two weeks.”
  10. “Q: How do you tell the difference between a bull and a cow? A: It is either one or the utter.”
  11. Q: What’s red and smells like blue paint? A: Red paint.”
  12. Q: Why was the woman afraid for the calendar? A: She said its days were numbered.”
  13. Want to hear a long joke? Jooooooooooooooke.”
  14. What does a house always wear to a party? Address.”
  15. “Dad: Did you hear the butter rumor? Well, I’m not going to spread it.”
  16. “Dad: I never thought I’d be the type to have a beard. But then it just grew on me.”
  17. “Q: What state is known for its tiny beverages? A: Minnesota”
  18. Q: Why did the computer get mad at the printer? A: Because it didn’t like its toner voice.”
  19. Q: What’s the best way to watch a fly-fishing tournament? A: Live stream it.”

Good Dad Jokes for Kids

Good Dad Jokes for Kids

Humor heals, and good dad jokes for kids are ideal for those times when your kid may be a bit bummed. They may not laugh, but hopefully, they at least crack a smile.

  1. “Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants to the course? In case he got a hole in one.”
  2. “You ever wonder what happens when doctors get frustrated? They lose their patients, of course.”
  3. “What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.”
  4. “What sits on the seabed and has anxiety? A nervous wreck.”
  5. “What’s the best air to breathe if you want to be rich? Millionaire.”
  6. “Why did the girl toss a clock out the window? She wanted to see time fly.”
  7. Why Did the vegetable call the plumber? It had a leek.”
  8. Dad: Another word of caution. Never tell secrets near a cornfield. They’re all ears.”
  1. How do celebrities keep cool? They have many fans.”
  1. “What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!”
  2. “Why did the boy bring a ladder on the bus? He wanted to go to high school.”
  3. “Why did the cowboy adopt a wiener dog? He wanted to get a long little doggy.”
  4. “How did the barber win the race? He knew a shortcut.”
  5. “What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.”
  6. “Why shouldn’t you trust trees? They seem shady.”
  7. “What kind of music scares balloons? Pop music.”
  8. “Why did the orange stop halfway across the road? It ran out of juice.”
  9. Q: Why did the coffee go to the police? A: To report a mugging.”
  10. Q: Did you hear about the king who was exactly 12 inches tall? A: He was a great ruler!”
  11. Q: What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? A: One is very heavy, the other is a little lighter.”
  12. Q: What’s the difference between a “dad joke” and a “bad joke?” A: The direction of the first letter.”
  13. Q: When does a regular joke become a “dad joke?” A: When it becomes apparent.”

Dad Jokes for Little Kids

Even the smallest children can still enjoy dad jokes, as long as you select some appropriate for their age level. Some dad jokes for little kids can be enjoyed by adults too.

  1. “Where do armies belong? In your sleeves.”
  2. Q: Why is the cow always smiling? A: It’s in a good mooood I guess.”
  3. “What did one plate say to another plate? Tonight, dinner’s on me.”
  4. How do you make a Kleenex dance?Put a little boogie in it!”
  5. “’Wow! (Name), you sure got tall. I hope you don’t grow another foot.’‘Why not Dad?’‘Because if you do, Mommy will need to buy you a third sneaker.’”
  6. “Dad, can you put my shoes on? Nope. They are too small for my feet.”
  7. How many apples are growing on that tree? All of them.”
  8. Time to take this cookie to the hospital! It’s feeling crummy.”
  9. What do you call a band of berries playing music? A jam session.”
  10. “What do you call a cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese!”
  11. Q: What side of a tree grows the most branches? A: The outside!”
  12. Q: Why is Peter Pan always flying? A: Because he Neverlands.”

Science Dad Jokes

Dad jokes are an important part of teaching kids about humor. But they don’t have to just teach humor, they can teach science too.

  1. “(Name), on average, how far can a dog run into the woods?” “Gee, Dad, I don’t know.” “Half way. After that, the dog is running out of the woods.”
  2. Did you ever notice ants don’t get sick? They’re full of anti-bodies.”
  3. What do you call a fish with four eyes? Fiiiish!”
  4. Why doesn’t a photon need a suitcase? Because it’s traveling light.”

89.“Dad to kid (in a serious voice): A word of advice, kid. Never trust atoms. They make up everything.”

90.“How does a musician win a fight? They call for Bach up.”

  1. “Q: How do you know carrots are good for your eyesight? A: Have you ever seen a bunny wearing glasses?”

Best Punny Dad Jokes

Funny dad jokes are a favorite, but don’t forget that many of the original dad jokes are punny. These dad jokes are best saved for older children who have mastered written and spoken language.

  1. “Mom said I should do lunges to stay in shape. That would be a big step forward.”
  2. “6:30 is my favorite time of day, hands down.”
  3. Dad to kids at dinner: I would tell you my pizza joke but it’s just too cheesy.“
  4. “Mom is mad at me because she asked me to sync her phone, so I threw it in the ocean.”
  5. “Every time I take my dog to the park, the ducks try to bite him. That’s what I get for buying a pure bread dog.”
  6. “ I love dad jokes, but I don’t have kids, which makes me a Faux Pa.”
  7. “I wanted to eat a watch for lunch, but it was too time-consuming.”
  8. “I don’t trust stairs. They’re always up to something.”
  9. “Justice is a dish best served cold. If it were served warm, it would be just water.”
  10. “Your mom and I let astrology get between us. It just Taurus apart.”
  11. “I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.”
  12. “Mom asked me to put ketchup on the grocery list. Now I can’t see anything.”
  13. “We’re renovating the house, and the first floor is going great, but the second floor is another story.”
  14. “I’m reading an anti-gravity book, and I just can’t put it down!”
  15. I entered a pun contest. I submitted 10 of my best puns to see if any would be a win. However, no pun in ten did…”
  16. “It’s raining cats and dogs, so be careful not to step in a poodle.”
  17. “A guy walked into a bar, and lost the limbo contest.”
  18. “My toddler is refusing to nap. He’s guilty of resisting a rest.”
  19. “I used to run a dating service for chickens, but I was struggling to make hens meet.”
  20. “Mom texted me from the grocery store to say they’re out of pasta, and we’re penneless.”
  21. Is the refrigerator running? Better go catch it!”
  22. “I’d avoid the sushi if I were you — it’s a little fishy!”
  23. “My therapist told me I have problems expressing my emotions. Can’t say I’m surprised.”
  24. “I used to be able to play piano by ear, but now I have to use my hands.”
  25. “I decided to sell the vacuum cleaner — it was just gathering dust!”
  26. “My boss asked me why I only get sick on workdays. I said it must be my weekend immune system.”
  27. “The wedding was so beautiful, even the cake was in tiers.”
  28. “I was wondering why the baseball kept getting bigger and bigger. Then it hit me.”
  29. “What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing. It just waved.”


Why Do Dads Tell Jokes?

Dads tell dad jokes for the purpose of entertaining their kids and friends. Sometimes they also tell dad jokes in an attempt to cheer up a child that may be feeling sad or down.

How Did Dad Jokes Originate?

The term “Dad Jokes” originated when it appeared in Gettysburg Times in 1987.


Whether you want to cheer up a friend, or maybe a young child, dad jokes for kids are the way to go. They are appropriate for all company and great when you just need a quick laugh. Stock up on your dad jokes for kids so you will have one no matter what situation you find yourself in.

Leave a Comment