The break down of a marriage is never a happy occasion and the kids are often the ones that suffer the most. Co parent counseling provides parents with a safe space in which to sort out their problems and come up with a plan that works not only for both parents but also for the kids involved.
What is Co Parenting Counseling?
Co parenting can be super difficult for everyone involved because it usually comes at a really hard time for families but what exactly is it? Co parenting is when parents who have just separated are still raising their child together so that neither of them has to be single parents.
We completely get how hard it is to raise kids with someone you don’t want to be with anymore and that’s okay. Well, there’s no need to panic because this is exactly where co-parenting counselling comes into play.
This will help you and your co parent with any miscommunication or conflicts that might be happening so that you can both do what’s best for your kiddo. Counseling might involve looking at how parents can work together again and put aside anything that has happened in the past because their child is the most important person in this scenario but we’ll touch on this later on.
What is the Goal for Co Parents?
Going through a divorce can be hard for everyone, especially your kids and so co parenting really puts them first. But what is the goal for coparents? In simple terms, coparenting therapy is there to help decrease the amount of conflict that’s going on at home so your kid copes a lot healthier and is under much less pressure and stress – sounds good doesn’t it?
What does counseling for co parents involve? You’ll find yourself being a lot more aware of what your child is going through and those communication skills will increase for sure. You’ll also find that you’ll be able to resolve conflict a lot easier and you’ll be putting your kid first which is always good news.
Your own goals will vary depending on your child’s needs as well as your co parent so it’s a good idea to have an outline of your goals before you go. If your sessions have been arranged by a judge then you may already have these goals written out but a therapist can help you do this in more detail again.
What Issues Can Co parenting Help With
Co parenting therapists can help you out in so many ways that you might not have even thought about.
Lack of communication is a major problem that comes with separated parents because there are a lot of fresh emotions so this is one thing that counseling can help with. They’ll probably ask the question – “why is there no communication?” And then you’ll all work together to sort it out.
Therapists will help you find any misunderstanding whilst parenting your kids and then you’ll all work together to move forward – teamwork really does make the dream work.
Another thing co parenting therapy can help with is finding a schedule that works for both parents but also works for any kids involved. Both parents will probably have different wants and needs when it comes to parenting so a counselor gives them a neutral place to work it out.
You might not have thought about this one but counselors can also help parents understand how they can help their kiddo deal with a divorce or separation – remember that their lives have just been completely changed and they need you to be there for them.
Types of Co Parenting Cunseling
- Communication – Counseling for co parents could involve a lot of communication because communication is core to things like this. By being able to communicate in a healthy way and by using these techniques, we can explain ourselves better as well as ask for assistance and make plans in a more effective way which is vital to co parenting. Teaching healthy communication will let you communicate better with your kid too so that you’re not arguing and you’re understanding each other.
- Conflict resolution – Nobody likes a good cop and bad cop situation, especially when your kid is at stake and so conflict resolution is one technique that co parenting counselors use to sort through it all. You may find yourself going around in circles with your co parent about the same issues or problems that you faced in your marriage and so it’s really important to get that gone. Coparent therapy will help you set those boundaries together so you’re not prying in your ex’s life and that you can both move on and focus on your little kiddo.
- Co parenting plan – Your therapist may put together a little co parenting plan for you both as a starting point to crack on with your co parenting journey and that’s great news. If you have a teamwork mindset and you work together to figure things out then you can do it and make this divorce much better for your child. This will include things like who takes the kids to medical appointments, who takes them to school, and so on.
Is the Child Involved in Co Parenting Counseling
So now that you know what co parent counseling is, you might be wondering if your child is involved. Well, this completely depends on your situation, and your therapist will help you decide what’s best for your family.
Many professionals suggest kids meet with the therapist on their own so that they can easily talk about any worries they have. This will be such a big help for your child so they can process what has just happened but it also helps the therapist understand what they need to work on with the parents. Don’t forget that your kids are the ones being affected so you need to talk to them to find out what’s working and what’s not.
What Can You Do in The Mean Time
Just like any other counselor, waiting lists can be quite long for coparenting therapists and so whilst you’re hanging about at home waiting for the phone call, there are a few things you can do to help the situation from the start.
- Turn your focus to thinking, not feeling
- Find stable ground in the middle
- Compliment the other parent sometimes
- If you’re going to disagree with your parent, do it in private and away from your kid
- Treat your coparent like a colleague – trust us, it’ll make it a lot less awkward and you won’t have as many arguments
- Parenting schedules are a great idea
- Set your own personal boundaries and then boundaries with your coparent
Cost of Co Parenting Counseling
Therapy is expensive no matter where you go and so it’s important to remember this whilst looking for a coparenting counselor. You’ll also need a good few sessions in with your coparent to make sure you’re doing what’s best for your kid. Yes, they’re expensive but they’re certainly worth it in the long run when considering how good it is for your kid.
You’ll find that you’ll be paying between $100 and $250 for each session which is around an hour long. This is of course dependent on what qualifications the counselor has and how experienced they are.
If you’re wondering is co parenting counseling covered by insurance the answer also varies. If a judge is involved then the answer is no but health insurance could maybe pay if the court is not involved so it’s worth taking a look into it.
How to Find a Co Parenting Counselor
The answer to this question depends on why you’re going to counseling. If you’re going because the courts have told you that you have to then they will almost definitely provide a list of successful counselors that can help you out.
If not then you’ll find plenty of options online if you do a quick search for qualified people in your area. You’ll probably have the best luck if you look through your insurance provider or if you use an online therapist directory.
Is Co Parenting Counseling Effective?
Is Family Counseling for Co Parenting effective? The answer is yes. This therapy is a very effective way of fixing any tensions or problems you may have with your co parent and so it’ll make you and your kid’s life a lot easier – you can’t really say no to that.
Co parenting counseling will give you a great bridge for communication which will make making those plans a lot easier. You may also learn to express how you feel or ask questions without prying too much into the other’s personal life which is brilliant for both parties as you just want to move on with your life.
Co Parenting Counseling
Co parenting will also set a really good example for your kids – yes, you are the role models. Everyone is hurting when people separate and so by undergoing coparenting counseling, you’re doing the right thing to make it as stress free as possible for you and your kids.
If your kids find themselves in a similar place to you in the future then they’ll know how to deal with it because they’ve had such brilliant role models like you and your co parent. Keep going, you’ve got this.